By this time tomorrow..

I may have the divorce decree in hand. My marriage has been over for quite some time now. But, tomorrow we go before the judge. I only hope my ex doesn't start nick picking about visitation...with a Halloween day here and a veterans day he needs there because that would only postpone everything..sending me into a RAGE. Honestly speaking...if I don't get that divorce decree tomorrow I don't know what I'm gonna do..real talk. Yeah, you can say. "Joy you will eventually get it" NAH, I WANT IT NOW! For heaven's sake, it's been YEARS. Deep down inside I know I deserve my walking papers but my track record of let downs won't allow me to get excited just yet. I won't really get into the details of our marriage because no matter how much I try to be honest it will only look like I'm bashing him. And plus at one time, I did care about him. *GAG* I will never know what my train of thought was when I linked up with him. However, this book I'm reading "Women who love too much" is shedding some light on why I made certain decisions. I will get into that much later.

With no exaggeration, marrying him was the worst decision I've made in my entire life thus far. This divorce process has been long and dragged on for far too long. In my heart I always knew that we were through and the papers were only an outward confirmation of what was already in existence. But, I really need it. I want my name back. I want to feel like a normal person again. Being in limbo for so long is tiring..exhausting. If there is a good outcome, I will blog it. If not, you won't see me around for a minute.

good night...