Like any other day I end it with a ride on the #4 train home. While standing there I felt someone staring at me. I'm blaring Jay-Z's "So Ambitious" in my ears, just grooving. I look down and notice a middle aged white woman . She was pretty slim, could have been a model at one time. Her face had red spots on it, tanned skin and her lips looked puffy like she had been in a fight. Damn. It didn't dawn on me that she just had some procedures done until I noticed her fanning her face. The first thing that came to my mind was "I ain't know it was like that". I went off on a rant in my mind that I will post much later. Anywhooo... Women are seriously paying money to look like me...to look like women that look like me?! The bitch in me wanted to lick her lips, sport the signature pouty lip or pull out my lip gloss and apply it slowly right in her face. But, my mind started to think about all the things we women go through to be beautiful, to feel good about ourselves. Yes, this woman was Caucasian, but I've been in her position myself. In an attempt to be beautiful I put perm in my hair that burned my scalp, damaged my hair and also dried it out. I didn't know there was another way. We do what we think we have to do until we either get tired or find another way. This woman..was an unnatural blond, got botox, collagen in her lips, tanned skin. She looked absolutely ridiculous. I could see everything right there...everything she was upgrading. Hmmm..I wonder if men see these things as well. But, it doesn't matter how I see her, to do these things to enhance her appearance I'm sure makes her feel good. Like her I see so many other women that look so silly with the outrageous make up, obviously somebody else's hair weave and all type of crazy colors in their hair. I just shake my head. But, it's all about how they see themselves. We go through phases. I'm sure there are women out there that have reached a certain level of self-awareness, and they probably look at me like this chic is doing too much. I don't find these different methods to be wrong. However I do feel there is a problem if you going for broke or you feel you can't live without them. It's like putting on all this armor to hide our essence. I have to work on this myself because I find that I get into these phases where I feel I HAVE to put on make up. So when I'm feeling dependent, I think about those times when all I did was wear lip gloss.
This well to do guy on facebook that I befriended posts many pictures of women that would give Stevie Wonder a good laugh. The sad thing is that the women feel that they look good. No one can tell them other wise. They have to come to the knowledge on their own. Make up, botox, collagen, weave, braids, wigs, tanning beds...are all here to help us enhance or upgrade those things we want to change. All I'm saying is when we get to a point where we can't see when enough is enough or don't feel comfortable in public with that enhancer of choice....we doing WAY too much..
Believe me this is more so for me than anybody....
5 people feelin' some type of way:
i feel you a 100% u couldnt pay me to leave the house if i wasnt lookin top modelish.. now i can give a damn how i look long as its not trashy or trifling..girl if we start loving the skin we are in we wud feel much better bout ourselves
Girl, I remember those days when I wouldn't go out because it was raining...lol Now when I look back on it, that was hilarious...SERIOUSLY a prisoner because I didn't want to mess up my perm. But hey we live and we learn. I get funny when I don't have on make up during certain events. But, I'm working on that. Thanks for reading.
some guys see it and understand where your weaknesses lie and thus attack it, others see it and hope you are more then just the outside trappings you put up. Some ignore it because if it ain real why fuck with it.
Part of it is female vanity that primping and propping, now some of it does draw the attention so we fellas don't complain too much. Unless it comes to a point where all my time is spent waiting for you to finish doing it. Sooner or later you are gonna have to ask me to take you as you are, naked completely flaws and all and the sooner the better. Because it's best for both parties to know whether or not they can handle what the other is offering
Women historically adorn themselves. There is nothing wrong with that. We like to enhance our eyes with color, our hair with color, and our bodies with textures and styles. That's part of being a woman. We adorn our temples in celebration of the spirit living within.
Taking it to that OTHER level, whereby we do not value that spirit or natural un-adorned selves, that right there is sad, pitiful and insecure. A woman that takes the time to show herself well kept is much different from a woman with self-hatred.
Truly, peace comes from knowing the difference.
Ahhh,the creatures we become in the ambition of acknowledged beauty....wanting to be seen and desired by all is a dangerous vice.
Quinn
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