Disclaimer: No, I didn't know Whitney, personally. No, I've never seen her sing live. No, I don't know every song or lullaby the woman ever sang in her entire life. Are people dying everyday? Yes. Does that sadden my heart? Yes. Do I have an opinion? Yes. Did she touch my heart? Yes. Let me tell you what her gift did for me.
She made singing seem so easy that I really believed I could sing as well. You know how powerful that is. Her gift was just that powerful that she was able to make others believe in themselves to hold similar gifts. Her voice enveloped you, took you in and almost always made you smile. Her song "Miracle" moves me to tears has her voice rises and builds through the entire song. When I close my eyes, I can feel myself soaring with her. Isn't that what singing is about? Taking a journey in five minutes or less. There are times I can literally hear her smiling while she is singing. I can hear her sassiness, her confidence. Bless her heart. Barbara said it best.
She had everything, beauty, a magnificent voice. How sad her gifts could not bring her the same happiness they brought us.
We can look at Whitney's terrible end and get caught up in the sorrow of it all. Take all the time you need. When you are done taking in the realization that she is not here, ask yourself this. Have you been given a gift? If so, is your gift a blessing to you? Are you allowing your gift to touch others? Lift up others? Is your gift a crutch to you? Do you resent your gift?
These are the questions I ask myself when I think about her talent, her life, her struggle. We can never know what really troubled this woman's spirit for her to make certain decisions. And just like anyone that has touched me, she had the ability to anger me with her nonchalant approach to her life, her talent, her loved ones.
The night I found out she had passed, I was going through a great deal of pain and disbelief myself. My own child is going down the wrong path. Because I love him, I have to stand there and watch him throw away opportunities, his abilities, his talents. You know how hard that is. To watch your child slowly kill their dreams before they even know what they are. That is how I felt about Whitney. Her mother must of been devastated standing by doing all she could, but not able to stop her daughter from destroying herself.
Much like our Father, our God..He stands by watching us kill our dreams, our gifts. He intervenes as much as He can. But, never trampling our free will. When we live each day not being the person He created us to be, it must be heart breaking. I can't even imagine that level of heart break. I can feel a little of it when I look at my own child. We may not know what our talents are, but one thing is true for us all. God has given us the beautiful gift of free will. Free will can be a beautiful thing if used with caution. We do all we can for those hurting until their own free will overtakes our efforts. It is their God given right. Is it painful to watch? Yes. Does it anger me? Yes.
I pray for Whitney's entire family. I pray for anyone going through any addiction. I pray for helpless family members looking at this slow decline.
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